Antepresente

Everyone was sleeping. Strangely, my sister wasn’t staying up late to finish late homework/surf the net. I woke up around midnight feeling very uncomfortable, restless. It was too hot, then too cold, then I couldn’t stay still, then I thought a mosquito bit me in my left hand and I kept scratching the fucker. Awful.

A couple of minutes later, I hear a huge rucus from the outside. A woman and another person (not sure if a man) were screaming, begging for help. The noise came from the building next to us, that has a large open hall from the front gate to the entrance. I couldn’t make out at first what they were saying, and due to previous incidents (the worst being when I witnessed a domestic violence episode through a window many years ago, where the guy threatened his wife with a gun) I don’t look out at the window right away when situations like these happen. 

The yelling got worse and worse, and in the midst of it a strange, loud groan that popped every two or three seconds. Fuuuuck!, I thought, someone is dying. Turns out the lady and the other person were dragging their mother through the hall, screaming at the neighbors for help to take the poor woman to the hospital who was choking. According to my mom, only two or three female neighbors attempted to aid them, struggling to find a ride to the clinic, located a couple of blocks from home.

The women managed to open the gate of the building and between them and the extremely distraught pair, carried the woman out. I am not sure if the groan came from her, but it was scary and loud and it stopped around the time they ran to the street. A car came out of the parking lot, and at the same time some police/military/military police vehicle approached the street. Two men exited the vehicle and approached them, then went to their car and picked up (I suppose) the woman and her family. In another car, that may have come out from the building”s parking area, other people followed the police. Being extremely familiar with the value of seconds and miliseconds, these policemen acted way too slow for the situation. Maybe they were shocked. Maybe they were too tired from the day’s festivities (yesterday was a national holiday).

My family, the four of us more than awake from the drama, commented what we saw and the thing that shocked us the most was the ridiculous amount of time passed from the moment the woman started screaming for help and the moment they left: over ten minutes, way too long considering there are about fifty clinics in my neighbornhood, and at least two big emergency-ready ones within five blocks from home. No one helped them until the janitor stepped in and called other women to help. The disconnection between neighbors was clear and it was horrible. I really don’t wish this to happen to anyone, and I really hope the woman and her family are fine, whether she made it or not.

By principle, I try not to complain too much, thus, I have little patience for people who whine constantly on the not so amazing things in life.

Unfortunately, it seems that “the” best way to make small talk with some people is by whining about anything. Somehow, talking about the weather, or the news, or, idk, the color of your shirt, leads most people into a masturbatory complaint black hole that’s almost impossible to pull out from.

Most of my family, not all of them, are very good at whining. And this is why, on big gatherings, I hardly speak to them anymore. 

As I Instagrammed about it, last week, we went to my mother’s hometown for a final ceremony for my grandmother’s death. About 60% of my extended family were present. Since I didn’t attend her funeral, people came up to me constantly asking how I was. Everything fine there.

Then, suddenly, the normal “How are you doing?” chat turned into complaining, for some of the following reasons:

• Politics: Ultimate masturbatory whining.
• The organization of the gathering: the food, the drinks, the location, the decorations.
• Other family members.
• The heat.

The circlejerk went on and on, until something happened that cut the conversation short (somebody had a phonecall, had to go elsewhere, etc.)

What I really hate about this whining thing is that I rarely hear people afterwards saying “I’m going to do _________ about it” in a proactive way. It may had to do with the fact that my boss (I still call her my boss) constantly insisted on us establishing active tasks for everything that came up after a status meeting. The only thing they achieve with their attitude is throwing their negative bollocks to another person. I don’t think there was a single chat of the ones I had to endure last week that ended with a precise call to action.

And, we’re talking about 50+ years, professional adults. They’re supposed to know better.

Leading by example, what will be my action course next time? Get bitchy and say, for example, “Wow! You really feel passionate about the hors d’oevures. How about you stop your circlejerk comments and think about ways to improve them for our next reunion?”

DISCLAIMER: the hors d’oevures were epic. Indian food FTW!